Monday, November 16, 2009

Look With Your Eyes and Not With Your Hands...

So, as a new SAHM, I spend more time than ever traveling around the city with my two children and I am always baffled and quite annoyed that strangers touch my children without my permission. In line at the grocery store, downtown or in my neighborhood, at Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts, at the museum or the mall...people feel comfortable touching my kids! Initially, I shoved off or snarled at anyone who would come within 3 feet of my kids, but it happens so often that I'm beginning to feel like it may be me???? I am not talking about a quick touch on the hand, I mean like, patting on the head caressing faces, pinching cheeks...what's that about? It's so bad that I now (even on days that its not raining) cover my son (who people touch the most) with his plastic stroller cover just so that strangers are not able to touch him.

Why do people like to touch other peoples' kids? I mean...how would they feel if I caressed their faces or pinched their cheeks? If I were a betting woman, I think they'd be freaked out and offended, so why touch my kids? I mean, I don't know where their hands have been. After working in an office with a shared bathroom, I've seen some pretty disgusting bathroom habits, such as not washing hands after using the toilet but shaking them off after coming out of the stall. I once overheard a female co-worker applying what sounded like some sort of feminine product in an adjoining stall and then left the bathroom without a drop of water touching her hands. Disgusting!!! Not to mention the gross nose and ear picking I witness everyday on the trains, in restaurants, or wherever or whenever someone thinks no one is looking.

I think the worst most recently, was someone rubbing my son's hair while examining my daughters' and asking the ridiculous question of whether or not they were my children...can you believe that? I was so pissed, that I snapped "keep your f!#$king hands off of my kids!" Completely out of character but I was so upset that someone had the audacity to touch my kids and then ask if they were mine!

It's happening so frequently that I often wonder...is it me? What would you do if a stranger touched your child? Vote in my poll.

5 comments:

  1. I feel the same way!!! I was also questioning myself about not wanting people to touch my kids. I dont want my kids to think that its okay!! Stranger danger! I work in a classroom as an aide with first graders and as close as I feel to them, I felt that it was important to non verbally communicate this "personal space" with them. I have one student (that is not in my class) that always has to touch me in the hallways, I felt it was important to tell him that it is not okay and that he touches me and that he has to ask.
    Its not a germ thing with me, it is the stranger factor! I dont want my kids to feel comfortable around anyone! where is the poll?

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  2. I go through the same thing with Laila, since she was baby she has always drawed a lot of attention, and people would always come up to her and want to touch her and give her things... this one incident a lady at the park started touching her hair and caressing it I was so angry I wanted to beat her. So now I tell Laila not to let anyone touch her and once she told someone one that had kneeled down "please don't touch me" and we just kept walking... unfortunately there are alot of evil spirits in this world and you don't know if that person touching your child has good intentions and the samething goes for pregnant bellies...
    Sorry my comment is way too long LOL

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  3. Definitely not too long! I think that's a great point about encouraging children to stand up for themselves. Especially since Mom and Dad may not always be around to do it for them.

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  4. I felt this way about my first born, he has has the Arnold Jackson cheeks, so it's hard for others to resist. Also as a new mom I didn't want ANYONE near him, I was very selfish with him. After a while I eased up and realized to take cue's from my babies if someone touch's them or holds them and they react with crying or fear, I step in, this includes grandparents, even to greet them with a kiss or hug, if my babies refuse I say it's okay. I believe that God will take care of whatever evil spirits, germs, come their way. People in general don't mean any harm, baby's bring out the best in most people, it's amazing the amount of attention you get once you become a mom or are seen pushing around a cute kid. God bless all of you and your children.

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  5. I just remembered standing in line with my son at Starbucks a few years ago and two older gentlemen were standing in front of us. One turned around and said, "you have a gorgeous son" and ran his hand thru my sons hair. I immediately pulled my son back and looked at this man with one of my evil glares. I was in shock!! When I got home, I looked up sex offenders in my area..especially since I just moved to a new area. I'll never forget that mans face...you just cant trust people these days. Even tho statistics show that close friends or relatives are the ones that seem to harm our children the most. With the internet being a big part of our lives, it is making the sex offenders UNIT even stronger. They are justifying their sickness with each other. Its totally okay to tell someone to not touch!!! I think we need to take every opportunity to teach our children the morals & ethics to prepare them to venture off on their own....especially our daughters!

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